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A nice post about insecurity about the future, so that when I'm 20 I can look at this and laugh at myself.

The problem with high school is everyone expects you to have your future all figured out. There are all these "mandatory" classes that have you research colleges, imagine what your future will be like, etc. The latest one was one where you even have to guess who your friends will be and what hobbies you will have! (For that I put piano, dance, and Star Wars. All the stuff I'm into right now. Though I'm not really sure about dance.)

I guess it's good to start visualizing your future. But I didn't know that involved knowing who your exact friends would be. I kinda thought all that stuff would take second place to school. For me future=college, especially with the college books I'm reading now.

As for schools, I know I want to stay in California. Maybe UCLA, USC, or Stanford would be good. I looked at Stanford's website the other day.

Sometimes I'm scared of college, because I'm afraid of having to fend for myself. But I'm also excited to be able to have freedom, drink a lot of coffee, and feel like an adult. Is it weird that I'm looking forward to be able to get a job?

I don't even know what I want to do.Maybe it'll be something involving computers, like  computer science or computer engineering. Or maybe science, or something...It must feel really good to know your calling in life.

Some people are all "I don't need to worry about this, I know God will take care of me!" Is that the right attitude to have? I'm not hyper-obsessed with this, not yet.  But is it better to be hyper obsessed or completely nonchalant about it all?

And will being homeschooled be an edge or disadvantage?



  1. Hmm, college. I know a lot about it from my brother who's a junior in college. There's no real way to prepare for it actually. All I know is when the kids first get in, they switch majors all the time, drink and party a WHOLE lot in the dorms, and cheat. Seriously, cheating rings are very common in college.

    I don't think it's exactly good to be hyper- obbsessed about college, but then again it's not completely good to be totally nonchalant about it either. I guess it depends. Most kids are happy to get away from "overbearing" parents who don't let them do what they wanna do. I suppose that's why most are so excited. Then there's some that are so excited because it's their future and they know what they're doing is important and they like the taste of freedom. Then again you can't be completely nonchalant about it because it's a big deal.

    So, I really don't know.

    I don't know if homeschooling will be an edge or disadvantage for you. All I know is that it's been an edge for my brother. It's helped him a whole lot.

    -Leia <3

  2. Ugh, college. My parents have been pushing college on me since...7th grade. Yea, they're obsessed. And here's the thing: I DON'T KNOWWWWWWWW. I don't know what college I want to go to, I don't know exactly what I want to major in.
    What I do know is that I'm looking forward to it alot though. I'm not going anywhere close to home though, because the last thing I want is my parents fussing over my...constantly.

    Also, I think that homeschooling will be an edge and a disadvantage. Homeschoolers get into alot of colleges easier than public schoolers because well...admit it, we're just smarter. xD But we lack the same social skills. I know that sounds like I'm making us into the homeschool stereotype, but most of us do lack the same social skills public schoolers have. Also, following a syllabus might be harder.

  3. My mom and I have been talking about colleges the last few months. I know what I want to do: filmmaking. There's no question about it. So we've been scouting out colleges that have film courses, and I think I know which one will be at the top of my list ;)

    Homeschooling? *shrug* As long as you haven't lived your whole life in your house isolated from the rest of the world, you'll be fine. I'm a homeschooler, but I can act like a normal person. (I'm sure you're a wonderfully socially competent person too ;)

    I'm not all relaxed about it, nor am I obsessed. I'm just planing ahead a little and taking it as it is.

    Thanks for this post, dear Amaranthine. It really blessed me. And I didn't realize before this moment that I like talking to similar aged people about college and the future.... :D

  4. College! Wow, I was talking with my mom about it just today. What a coincidence.

    I'm not sure what I want to do about college, and I'm really tired of people constantly asking me about my plans. (I don't have any yet! Get over it!) My difficulty is that I have a general idea of what I'd like to do with my life (something to do with writing books), but I'm not sure if I should pursue a degree related to writing, or pick one that would be more practical in helping me get a 'real' job. Part of me likes the idea of taking a year off between high school and college to get a job and get a taste of the real world. I'm also considering online college and CLEPing out of classes. Now, if I could even begin to narrow it down...

    I think a balance between the nonchalance and the full-throttle panic is to have the peace of knowing that God will take care of us, but to still investigate the matter and prepare as much as we can. Ideally. Not that I'm anywhere close to that. I'm worried about making the wrong choices about where to go, what to major in, and all that. Mostly I don't want to think about it yet.

    I agree that homeschooling will be an advantage on one end and a disadvantage on the other. But to my mind, the stuff we homeschoolers haven't quite mastered yet is stuff we can pick up pretty quickly, so I wouldn't worry about it.

    Thank you for posting this. It comforts me to know that I'm not alone in my worries and indecisiveness.

  5. College............

    I actually know which college I'm going to go to and what I'm going to major in: theatre.

    My big problem is: How in the world am I going to PAY for it?!

    At least I'm planning on living at home.


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